If someone has more heart to break, there’s more personal power wanting to come in.

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RESOLVING SEXUAL DISTORTIONS

Just because you CAN eat more, and want to, doesn’t mean you should.

Just because you CAN get paid for that job, and want the money, doesn’t mean you should.

Just because you CAN have sex, and want to, doesn’t mean you should.

Every decision we make is an allotment of our sexual energy.

The animal within us is designed to make impulsive decisions based on the fight/flight/freeze/f*ck brain

In fact, it’s no mistake that the f*ck impulse often resembles and even sounds like a fight.

It’s no coincidence that people are addicted to masochistically receiving pain, or to sadistically inflicting it.

These impulses are created by trauma, which is a chronic engagement of the brain’s fear center.

From the standpoint of our bio-computer, there is no difference between a fear and a craving. Both represent our relationship with power as an external force.

In the work that I do, people expose to me their deepest vulnerabilities. Their most tender pains.

It is of the utmost importance that I ensure the deepest possible clarity of my sexual energy.

On the one hand, suppressing my animal instincts is harmful. They must be thoroughly acknowledged, understood, and felt.

On the other hand, these instincts must be adequately dealt with BEFORE those healing experiences so as to maintain rapport and safety for myself and each individual.

Self-control and emotional regulation means making a firm decision, creating firm boundaries with ourselves, in regard to our values. Our values are literally ‘who we are’. We can only trust ourselves and trust our values if we are aware of them.

I feel temptation often. Many women (not all) test my integrity, consciously or unconsciously, multiple times per day. I know all the tricks. The damsel in distress. The oral movements. The subtle invitations. One could say that the temptation I’m feeling is an empathic experience of the temptation they are feeling.

The part that makes this complex is when they believe they ‘want’ me, where in reality what they usually want at a deeper level is simply to be seen and felt.

The self-control on my part must click in and remind me regularly that it actually has nothing to do with me. Any desire I have to feel special and wanted is an animalistic response to the empathic experience we’re sharing.

One of the fundamental misunderstandings regarding sexuality is that we need a partner to experience it. There’s nothing non-sexual about us. Every step we take relies on sexuality. Our forward movement is our very being making sweet love to life.

Sexuality has been simultaneously grossly underestimated and overestimated at the same time. Underestimated, in that it exists in our whole lives and not just in the bedroom. Overestimated when the physical intimacy is taken for granted as some sort of cure-all, and not having its motivations more deeply questioned.

The seeking of pleasure is one of the most fundamental scarcity based addictions of humanity, because it depends on the avoidance of pain. No one who is in a state of play (our natural state) will ever insist on locating more pleasure.

When I experience a woman approaching me from the motivation of unconscious pain, it can still feel flattering. Her playfulness can appear completely genuine, even to herself, not realizing it’s a persona designed to manipulate my animal aspects.

It would be quite harmful for me to engage in the vast majority of impulses I feel. Those impulses are most often not in integrity with my soul. If my presence, for example, were significantly deeper than the presence of my partner…a sexual relationship without a commitment would cause a re-traumatization of the belonging wound which causes the sexual addiction in the first place. The ‘toxic masculine’ aspect of a man’s animal aspect has no problem using and discarding a woman as a disposable piece of meat. Obviously, this is not a sustainable practice for society.

The real opportunity is in the acknowledgement of a man’s own pain which fuels this objectified temptation to use and discard.

Practices like polyamory capitalize on the existence of this wounding, justifying it as normal human behavior simply because of a lack of trauma resolving tools. Nothing is ‘wrong’ with any sort of sexual perspective, there are simply varying levels of depth that each individual may or may not be ready to assimilate.

To me, the real question is: Does an individual want to meet a need, or to resolve it? Most people are deeply afraid of resolving needs. A need coming to completion is the ultimate freedom, and yet from the perspective of scarcity this concept can feel like a trap. The incredible irony in this confusion is unmistakable, when the emotional freedom appears to be a trap.

What if I’m not walking around craving sex anymore? Then what? Will anyone still want me? How can I be attractive if I’m not driven to procreate?

This freedom is the space in which our power can be fully honored and expressed. Our energy can be focused in totality, free of the need for approval. No longer do we obsess about how we are perceived.

It would be irresponsible to idealize or condemn anyone’s current state or status. We are where we are. So this brings about the practical question of, what do I do with this information? The key for all transcendence lies in paradox. Touching upon and holding multiple realities simultaneously.

I control and regulate my primal urges, except for the times I choose to fully let them loose and experience them to their core.

I operate with impeccable precision and thoughtfulness, except for the times when I choose to embody the wildness of my rabid beast.

I focus on my breathing as a sustainable means of distributing my sexual energy, except for the times in which I choose to focus on tearing a loved one’s clothes off.

Remember that attachment will more than likely result from your physical intimacy, but also no need to be obsessed about it.

Allow for the reality that sexual ‘needs’ are illusions based on trauma, and yet we can also create devotional spaces in which to give ourselves permission to explore those deepest desires.

It’s important too that we understand that we must psychologically individuate before we can spiritually awaken. The emotional function of sex is for the purpose of achieving individuation. This is why it remains relevant, even in light of all I’ve shared here. It’s not a story completing tool, but it is an individuation cultivation modality. This is exactly why teenagers start becoming curious about sex, because that’s our primary individuation stage of development. Sex cravings are sourced from the inner teenager aspect of the nervous system.

There are many tools for accomplishing true need resolution. It won’t be likely to occur through reading material.

One of the main points here is that Sex is NOT needed to heal sexual wounding. The Quantum Theater experience that I facilitate is one such tool and opportunity for going deeper in a safe way. Feel free to connect with me about scheduling an experience, or I can help find you another way that feels right for you.

Joshua

Lust is both Heaven and Hell

It’s the name of a loop we get distracted into

Most people don’t realize that their lust is pre-programmed into them by their family’s unconscious values. Very specific family dynamics are wanting to play on repeat.

Because it’s the easiest way to channel our firey demon energy. Our inner BEAST. It’s got to go SOMEWHERE, afterall….

I know that temptation very well. And nothing is wrong with it….It’s simply very easy to become unconscious of. If you use it….USE IT to tear you apart. USE IT to rip the initial attraction from your system aka Resolve Your Needs (more on this soon). It’s medicine so you can heal…and if it does its job you don’t need that medicine anymore.

What if that power was reclaimed, to be saved for our True Intentions? So our Inner Angel could also be charged up and activated for the Truth of our holy mission?

 

Joshua

If you’re unsure about your relationship or craving a new one, your mission is unclear

If you’re feeling annoyed at the world’s noise, your mission is unclear

If you’re depressed and wallowing or anxious and wobbling your mission is unclear

If you’re not willing to forgive someone, your mission is unclear

If you’re not willing to surrender to the Truth, your mission is unclear

If you’re not sure where you want to live, your mission is unclear

If you’re pretty happy and pretty content but it seems like something is still missing…

Any questions?

 

Joshua

Seeing ourselves is synonymous with self-realization.

And if we make our gifts and our shadows are known to the world, being seen by others helps us to see ourselves.

Don’t hold back your shining light for fear of codependency. Simply know your true motivations.

There’s no need to pretend you are completely altruistic in your actions. Wearing a mask doesn’t feel good.

Do it for you, own it.

Simply be aware that we are all using one another to evolve together and therefore to honor each other with greater presence.

 

Win/Win ?

Joshua

Being ‘Evolved’ is NOT about:
How you spend your time
How you feel or vibrate
How awake you are
How much you’ve processed
Or who you know

It’s solely dependent on your ability and self-sufficiency to change…to EVOLVE. To be your own best parent[s] and lover.

The rest are all side effects.

Do you have the Masculine courage to behave outside of your old identity?

Do you have the feminine courage to surrender to deeply unfamiliar territory?

We must expand in BOTH directions or we WILL see the obvious consequences of avoidance.

We are attracted to drama. Our nervous systems crave intensity and contrast. This is the unconscious inner conflict – the seeking of pain and self-sabotage which is so confusing to people. This is why we like stories with lots of drama, like discovering that I had ants crawling all over me. It makes things interesting and therefore to the nervous system (as long as it fits the safety of our identities).

So when we consciously own our darkness, the nervous system no longer needs to seek it out and find it unconsciously. And self-sabotage fades away.

Joshua

Chasing Women, manipulating, controlling…. typical “toxic” behavior. This is all because we make it wrong to connect to ourselves and then have to get presence elsewhere. This is also why we dream….it supplies us with presence. Presence is life.

Someone has to be present one way or the other. This is the driver of all culture and social osmosis.

When we as Men CONSUME…when we energetically eat up our desire to control the behavior of the feminine…..when we tap the energy of that desire…own it…..process the grief inside it…

We gain access to nourishing ourselves with the life force attention we have been so desperate to receive from them.

Our shallow satisfaction in “getting blown” is often a thinly veiled DENIAL of our own power and our own potential to fuck ourselves ecstatically in every breath.

Addiction to porn, fantasies on repeat….these are the result of a decision saying “I am not more than this”. Right. As if you are not an infinite creator God. With access to Genius beyond words. We see you.

It’s in owning our deepest darkest desires…. and simply processing them…. that we can integrate disowned cells and even entire disowned organs in our physical bodies.

If we can fast from food and soak in Prana from the sun….we can also learn to generate presence without the reflection of another.

My path to Self-Generation of Presence:
I used to require a person to talk to….then I started recording audio clips of myself talking…..then I started chanting by myself…..then I started talking and chanting to myself in the mirror…then straight up having conversations with different aspects of my soul…then speaking in tounges…and in the end it all becomes distilled now into public content. Now I assist and encourage my clients to consume their desires and output the burning of this chaotic energy by speak gibberish just to finally let their personal denied energy to run free.

Part of this process is dietary and clearing out accumulated gut plaque so we can actually have some available organs to store the newly generated voltage of presence.

This message is about taking deeply intentional personal responsibility, not out of guilt, but because it fucking feeds us when done with the integrity of our own values.

If you’ve ever been curious about what loving ourselves actually means….there it is.

I help people cultivate presence if that’s what you’re committed to.

Joshua

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